Dear Dr. Rain:
Our oldest child is turning 9 years old and wants an iPad for a birthday present. My parents offered to buy it but we are torn. We worry that it turns kids into little zombies, but maybe we are overreacting. What kinds of guidelines are out there? Signed, Old School Parents
Dear Old School Parents:
Technology has quickly changed the landscape of many aspects of life in less than a generation. Each new gadget is exciting and provides fun and education for each member of the family. It has all happened so rapidly, that many parents are worried about the impact on their children. On the other hand, they realize their children will be competing in a wired world, and that their peers are using gadgets as a part of socializing and staying connected to friends.
The American Academy of Pediatrics has recommended no more than two hours of screen time daily. This includes TV, tablets, cell phones, and video games. Many professionals also recommend no screen use within an hour of bedtime. These gadgets appear to interfere with the ability to fall asleep.
There is nothing inherently evil about using a tablet of course. The major concern is that the frequent use of these gadgets replaces important activity that is necessary for physical health, mental health, learning, and creativity. Furthermore, because these gadgets go online, children can be exposed to very damaging information and visual images in the blink of an eye.
Did you know that Steve Jobs and many of his colleagues did not allow their children to use an iPad and tech gadgets? These technology wizards observed the downside of tech gadgets first hand. These gadgets have replaced playing outside with friends, building things by hand, thinking creatively with toys, exploring the natural world, and learning from people and books. While our children may become tech wizards, other areas of development are neglected. Hundreds of hours are spent sitting still, playing mindless addictive games rather than engaging with the world.
I do not think a 9 year old needs an iPad. If you decide to allow this in your home, I encourage you to set clear rules about it’s use. Many parents allow it’s use only on the weekend, and when it is convenient to the parent (e.g. while the parent is cooking supper, or on a long car ride etc.).
Set an example for your children. Do they have to wait to interact with you while you scroll through Facebook and emails? Or do you save that for after their bedtime so you can interact with and be engaged with the world around you? When you sit in a waiting room with your child, are you both isolated from one another, checking your phones non stop, or are the phones off and you are reading together or joking about the day? Are you getting most of your exercise indoors by moving your thumbs, or do your children see you actively exploring the outdoor world, are roughhousing with them indoors? You get the idea.
These are things parents can discuss with each other. You will not harm your child by refusing to buy an iPad. They are very expensive gifts for such a young child, with not much payoff. You will not harm your child by buying an iPad. The trick is the limits you set on the use of the iPad and all of your child’s electronics.
